“Your Child is Perfect” – One Mom’s Letter to Her Doctor

Have you ever wanted something really bad? You worked so hard to prepare for it. You thought about it every minute of the day. When it finally seemed like it was time to celebrate your success, someone was there to tell you “Stop.” You cannot have what you wanted, what you’ve dream of, and prayed for. You need to destroy what you’ve done and start over as if you were writing something on a piece of paper and could just ball it up and toss it in the trash, confident another blank page was waiting for your success.

 

Now imagine if what you wanted were a child. You’ve watched everyone else become a mom and so wanted that for yourself. You did every thing healthy to prepare your body and finally became pregnant. Now imagine the doctor telling you something was wrong with that child. Imagine they told you to get rid of him/her and try again later. What would you do?

Would you follow doctor’s orders? Would you seek a second opinion? Would you look at the mom friends around you with their “perfect” kids and decide you wanted that and only that? Would you feel like you were alone and without any choice but the doctor’s? Most importantly, what, if anything would you say to that doctor?

One mom spoke up, alone in her pain, chose to no longer feel alone in the middle of her maternal crisis. She was told by the doctor to abort her child because it would not be “perfect.” Still, she made the choice to have her baby. She realized despite the medical diagnosis, her baby was perfect and had something to contribute to this world. But she also felt the pain of realizing others were not as blessed to believe they had choices and who blindly trusted the recommendation of that and other doctors to abort their child. Her empathy for others prompted her to write and open letter to that doctor.

A portion of the letter reads:

I came to you during the most difficult time in my life. I was terrified, anxious and in complete despair. I didn’t know the truth yet about my baby, and that’s what I desperately needed from you. But instead of support and encouragement, you suggested we terminate our child. I told you her name, and you asked us again if we understood how low our quality of life would be with a child with Down syndrome. You suggested we reconsider our decision to continue the pregnancy.

To see a copy of the full letter click HERE.

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