10 Things NOT To Say To A Pregnant Woman

I’m now 8 months pregnant, and I can honestly say I’ve heard some of the most ridiculous comments from people during my pregnancy. I’ve heard comments that have gone from uber nosy to downright rude and obnoxious. Having experiences like this help me remember what NOT to say to another pregnant woman. Here are 10 things NOT to say to a pregnant woman. Feel free to add more if you’d like.

1. Wow, you’re huge!
Right, because it’s not like I look down at myself every day and see a large boulder-sized belly looking back at me, I definitely needed you to point it out to me. Thank you for that!

2. Is it your husband’s/boyfriend’s baby?
Now, this was one of the most idiotic questions I’ve been asked during the pregnancy. If this baby wasn’t from my husband/boyfriend, do you think I’d really share it with you? Thankyouverymuch!

3. Are you sure there’s only 1 baby in there and not 2?
*Facepalm* That is all…

4. In regards to pregnancy, Google says…
Anything Google says, you can pretty much bet that we stopped listening to you once you said “Google said”. Unless Google can replace the care of our Midwives/Doctors, please save your Google facts.

5. Did you get pregnant by accident?
Clearly, if I’m having sex, there’s a possibility of pregnancy, just as there is for anyone having sex. So while the baby may or may not have been planned, you asking that is overstepping your boundaries.

6. Did you want another baby?
So how much money is in your bank account? Not my business right? Exactly! Just say congratulations. The prying, invasive questions are so unnecessary.

7. Are the kids happy about a new baby?
No, they’ve actually staged a protest and are filing injunctions against the new baby as we speak. Seriously? It’s an adjustment for any family. A better question would be to wait until after the baby is born and ask how is everyone adjusting? Is there anything I can do to help?

8. You look like you’re about to drop a load.
I’m sorry, are you referring to taking a massive dump or giving birth to a baby? The phrase drop a load just sounds so abrasive and gross.

9. Can you still have sex while you’re pregnant?
Seriously? Can you still take a shower in the summer? What kind of ridiculous question with no boundaries is that?!

10. You look like you’re about ready to pop!
Again, do I look like a balloon? Please don’t tell a pregnant woman she looks like she’s ready to pop.

Feel free to add any others you can think of. We’d love to hear it!

Sharing is caring:

An Open Letter To My Breastfeeding Baby

My love, my dear love,

You bring so much joy to my life.  You light up my world.  Your smile is a blessing, and I can’t begin to tell you just how much you mean to me.  I love how during our nursing time I’m able to trace the little curls you have and to hold you close to my heart, watching your eyes blink slower and slower until you fall into milk dreams.  There are some things we have to discuss and straighten out with you, my breastfeeding baby:

I know the world is interesting, it’s downright fascinating!  But pleeeease, for the love of God, let go of my nipple before you turn your head to see what’s going on around you!  I know you don’t know it, but my nipples have nerve endings in them and are not made of taffy allowing it to stretch like a piece of chewed bubble gum.  I’m not sure if you can actually stretch nipples out or not, but I would prefer not to learn that it is possible because my own nipples are now scraping the ground when I walk.

And yes, my little love, I know you’re impatient and want to nurse, but can you not try and climb your entire body in my shirt? Or even better, yank my shirt all the way down, exposing me to the world.  Let me adjust myself for you.  While I have no qualms about breastfeeding in public, I would appreciate not swinging in the breeze until I can get you in a position to latch on.  Which leads me to my next point.

My body is not a jungle gym!  Yes, you’re getting older and exploring, and if there’s something available to climb, better believe you’ll climb it. However, climbing isn’t a problem until you’re trying to climb WITH MY NIPPLE IN YOUR MOUTH! Again, they do not stretch like taffy! Please have some consideration for the fact that they’re actually attached to my body still.  Having your elbow digging in my chest and your foot pushing off of my face makes me feel like I’m in an MMA cage fight, but only one of us is doing the damage.

Sometimes I wish I could detach my breasts while you’re nursing!  Yes, you read that right.  There are so many times when I feel like my bladder is about to explode, but you’re clamped on to my nipple like it’s literally, the jaws of life!  I wish I could detach my breasts for a moment and make a beeline to the bathroom.  My bladder has sent out code red alarms too many times letting me know it would hold no more.  Until then, I didn’t even know I could pull off some of the acrobatic tricks that I have.  Some days I make it and you stay sleeping.  Other days I have to just let you cry like a blaring alarm just went off and come back to comfort you with an empty bladder.  FYI it’s much easier to comfort you when I can sit still and not squirming and doing the peepee dance.

Even with all of those minor nuisances, those are all just itty bitty things compared to the satisfaction I get knowing that the milk and the antibodies you’re receiving from me are quite literally making you healthy and strong.  I wouldn’t change this opportunity for anything in the world.  Not every mom is afforded this bonding time with their baby and I’m so grateful for it.  I just have to keep reminding myself of this when it’s time to nurse you again.

Sharing is caring:

Breastfeeding Moms: The New Generation

Yesterday while shopping at the Dutch Market with my mother in law, I had my 9 month old baby strapped to my chest in a baby carrier.  Now, like all babies, he of course wanted to nurse, so I pulled the hood over his head and allowed him to start nursing as I continued shopping. For the rest of the shoppers, they had no idea the baby was nursing because the top was covered. An older woman, appearing to be in her 60’s, walked up to me and with one finger pulled the hood back to see the baby. STRIKE 1!

Then she says “Oh you’re breastfeeding! Girl, you need to get out of here with that!” STRIKE 2!

She follows with “I knew he was a boy, how did I guess that?” Ummm….he’s wearing a blue shirt and looks completely like a boy! You must be psychic! So now I’m conflicted.  Everything in my head said to clap back. However, everything my parents taught me about respecting elders conflicted with that.  I just smiled at her, walked away and continued shopping and nursing.

I realized that the generation from before and my generation are totally different when it comes to breastfeeding. They were taught to shame and to hide. We are normalizing breastfeeding as a movement. I, personally, still maintain some cover in public places when possible. While it is not for the comfort of others, it’s simply for my own comfort.

I’ve realized that it’s not every older woman that feels like that either. At my son’s soccer practice, my husband was trying to cover me up while nursing. The woman says “Aw just let her be. People need to get over that stuff. Babies gotta eat! You’re not trying to show your breasts to anyone.” I said “Thank you!!”

However, the situation in the Dutch Market had me thinking, how do we bridge the gap between the generations? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Sharing is caring:

2 Young Moms Breastfeed Each Other’s Babies

These 2 young moms have decided that they want what they believe to be the best nutrition for their babies, and are working together to do just that. Stefani Tatavitto, 23, is the mom to her 2-year-old son, and Chrystal Klein, 23, is the mom to her 19-month-old daughter.
Chrystal works at a factory while Stefani watches her daughter and nurses her like she does her own. When Stefani needs to go out Chrystal watches her son and nurses him. These two women have been friends for the last 5 years and actually met on a social network. Facebook to be exact!
To many, this may seem like a strange arrangement, but history has repeated time and time again that other women would nurse babies when the mother couldn’t or wouldn’t. Buying donated breast milk is also a hot commodity as well. The health benefits received through breast milk have been widely documented. No shade to any formula mommies or babies. As long as your baby is fed and healthy, that’s what counts!
One word of advice if you’re considering an arrangement like this: Make sure the person nursing your child can be tested for any communicable diseases that can be passed through breast milk.
Funny enough, my brother asked me the other day if I’d let my sister who is nursing her 18-month-old nurse my 3-month-old if I had to. I told him absolutely! This set up is clearly not all that strange to me as you can see.
Would you let someone else nurse your baby? Would it depend on who? We’d love to hear your thoughts!

Sharing is caring: