Stop Waiting!

Two women began their journey to become successful fashion entrepreneurs at the same time, attending the same university, networking in the same circles, and having access to the same resources. After graduation one sent resumes to various clothing and fashion corporations seeking employment. She mailed, e-mailed, and faxed then waited for a response. The other also sent resumes seeking employment but did not solely wait for a response. While waiting she also designed, cut, and sewed together original fashions that she then took to local boutique in an effort to get them on the rack and noticed by consumers. What she did not sell to boutiques she promoted on social media and sold online and out the trunk of her car. She went to the local office supply store and purchased paper for letterhead and business cards. She did what she could with what she had to get where she wanted to go while waiting for her resume to be noticed. Soon her finances looked up. Her fashions were seen all over town and abroad. Her name became known among the up-and-coming in the fashion world and she received more responses then she ever imagined. Eventually, the first woman was able to get an entry level job with a clothing company and progress but never saw the success of her former college classmate.

GET THIS!  Standing still gets you nowhere.  Really, what are you waiting for? We have been programmed to believe we have to do what we can to get a job. We work very hard to fulfill someone else’s dream. The person who owns the company you work for has fulfilled his or her dream of being a successful entrepreneur, why can’t you. The person who does your hair is living their dream of owning a salon, why can’t you. The person who educates your children is succeeding in walking in their purpose of educating and empowering others, why don’t you.

Everyday you should be doing something to get you closer to achieving your purpose and fulfilling your dreams. That doesn’t always look like business ownership for everyone; no doubt.  It is about living your dream and doing the one thing you were created to do. That is your purpose. While you are waiting for something to happen, looking for a sign, or waiting for the right time – do something. Order some business cards with the title you want, not the one you have. Register your business name so the possibilities become real to you. Trust and invest in yourself. Walk in your success before you can see it. If you do not do something and move forward, you are guaranteed one thing – NOT to reach your goal.

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You’re A Wife And Mom…Now What?

You can be a good mother and follow your dreams.  You totally can if you so desire.  Many women desire to become a wife and mother.  We dream of the day we tell our husbands that they are expecting their first child.  When the baby is born we are so enamored with their little hands and feet and with their smell.  We are instantly consumed with their every move after while they are walking and no longer need to be held.  Two years have passed and you have another baby to take care of now you feel that your family is complete.  The family of four looks and sounds so cool and again you are consumed with your husband and the children that you have been blessed with.  You look at yourself in the mirror and you no longer recognize yourself because you’ve put so much energy into them.   You begin to ask yourself what is my purpose besides being a wife and mother.   Then mommy guilt pops up because you feel that your children need you. So anything you desire to do is put on the back burner so that you can continue to watch after your family.

That’s when you begin to see yourself as in individual so you begin to encourage yourself about following your dreams. Maybe it’s returning to school or starting a business.  From experience being a wife and a full-time  mom of two I wrote my first book called “the Happy Wife” in 2014.  Just recently I received my Associate’s Degree from the University of Phoenix seeing my children’s eyes light up when they saw my diploma as well as telling me how proud of me they are. That made my day!  Your children will love you even more when they see that their mom is happy and isn’t letting anything stop you from accomplishing your goals.  I cannot wait to put on my cap and gown and walk across that stage in July. Being a wife and mother is great but there’s no greater feeling than knowing that I accomplished something that pushed me to be a better me.  We are our children’s first role model.  Remember that!

 

 

 

 

 
Photo credit: Cia de Foto / Foter / CC BY

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Are You Sleeping With “The Enemy”?

I remember when I wanted to start my business Nadine Renee Naturals.  My husband wasn’t fully convinced that all this “natural stuff” actually worked.  It wasn’t until I made a believer of him, but using the natural remedies, that he changed his mind.  The more I made, and exposed him to, the more he was convinced.  He is fully convinced now, and supports my career choice.  When I decided to start SexyMomsRock with Denise, he was supportive once again.  He loved the idea, and thought women would respond well to such a positive business.

Thankfully, I haven’t had to battle with my husband about supporting my business goals.  While we both continue to maintain two completely different viewpoints of business, we continue to support each other, even through the discouraged days.  Please believe that there are days when you do feel discouraged, and you don’t want someone around you that would dump on you during those days.  You want to be with someone who can encourage you on those days, and allow you to vent.

So what happens when the person you’re with is rooting for your failure? What happens when they want to be in control, and can’t bear to see your business or vision thrive?  What happens when their insecurities make them say things so hurtful that you second guess the choices you’ve made, and the vision only you can see?

Insecurity can cause people to turn on you quick.  Insecurity can cause a spouse, or significant other to become someone unrecognizable.  Chances are, if this rings a bell with your mate, you’ve already seen the warning signs long before you showed them you wanted to go forward in your career or business.  These are warning signs you probably chose to ignore, or thought you could “fix”.  In only a few cases is this something that only arises when the situation arises.

So what do you do?  There are only a few things you can do in this situation.

1) Counseling: You can do couples counseling to find the root of the problem, and to see if this behavior can be changed.  Unfortunately…or fortunately, you will get out of this what you BOTH put into it.  Often times the root of the jealousy, or insecurity is rooted in the mate feeling like they have not achieved the potential for their own lives.  While it is not your personal issue, but one that they need to handle, it allows you to get a clearer picture in to the heart of the situation.  This will show you whether the situation can even be changed, or if it’s a dead relationship.

2) Decide: You will need to decide how important having your partner’s support and encouragement is to you.  for some, they are able to turn the views of their partner around by exposing them to what it is they do, or exposing them to the profits of the job or business.  If you are one of the people that can stand on your own, and that is not a major factor in your relationship, then it may be an area you both need to keep separated, but the relationship itself can continue to stay intact.

3) Follow Your Dreams: If the encouragement and support is something you desire, and require in your relationship, and your partner can not or will not fulfill that need, you may have to follow your dreams and let go of a dead relationship.   Sure, you can stay and hope they will change.  You might even be able to convince them.  After you’ve given it your all, you need to decide what’s best for you.  Following your dreams may be the choice you have to make.

As for me, support is a desire and requirement for my relationship.  It would put a major strain on my marriage if my husband could not, or would not support my dreams.  I support my husband’s vision and his dreams, and I expect the same in return with mine.  This is a non-negotiable need in my relationship.

So let us know, have you been sleeping with “the enemy”?  What have you done about it?  What worked/didn’t work for you?  Do you regret your decision?  We’d love to hear from you!

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What Is My Purpose?

Have you ever felt like you were meant for something bigger? Do you get tired of the humdrum of fighting traffic to get to a job that doesn’t pay you enough, to spend most of your week away from the house that you’re struggling to pay mortgage on? Do you have a dream, but tell yourself now is not the time? Or I can’t afford to do it? Or any other reason to talk yourself out of pursuing your purpose?

Someone once told me to find what you love to do, and figure out how to get paid for doing it. That simple statement stuck with me. Have you ever seen the guy on the food network show that goes to all of these different states, and gets paid to eat? He loves to eat, and the network pays him to do it. Now that’s what I call a career!

We all have something that we’re good at. If you haven’t found it yet, just sit and think about what area you excel in. If need be, ask loved ones what area they see you excel in. Once you have that, think outside the box. You don’t have to follow a traditional path like others have.

If you excel in teaching, create a program that you would like to teach, and offer it. If you like to bake, think about opening a specialty dessert business. What I’m saying is your only limitation is yourself. There are few things worse than unfulfilled purpose, and a life of regrets.

For example, I excel in teaching, and my passion is health. I (along with my business partner) started Nadine Renee Naturals. (www.nadinereneenaturals.com) That’s just one area I’m fulfilling my purpose. 2SexyMoms is another area. Since you’re already on this site, and reading this blog, you already know what we’re about. (smile)

So my question to you is this, are you fulfilling your purpose? If not, why not? What’s stopping you? Think outside the box! Live your purpose and you’ll never have to “work” a day in your life!

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