My love, my dear love,
You bring so much joy to my life. You light up my world. Your smile is a blessing, and I can’t begin to tell you just how much you mean to me. I love how during our nursing time I’m able to trace the little curls you have and to hold you close to my heart, watching your eyes blink slower and slower until you fall into milk dreams. There are some things we have to discuss and straighten out with you, my breastfeeding baby:
I know the world is interesting, it’s downright fascinating! But pleeeease, for the love of God, let go of my nipple before you turn your head to see what’s going on around you! I know you don’t know it, but my nipples have nerve endings in them and are not made of taffy allowing it to stretch like a piece of chewed bubble gum. I’m not sure if you can actually stretch nipples out or not, but I would prefer not to learn that it is possible because my own nipples are now scraping the ground when I walk.
And yes, my little love, I know you’re impatient and want to nurse, but can you not try and climb your entire body in my shirt? Or even better, yank my shirt all the way down, exposing me to the world. Let me adjust myself for you. While I have no qualms about breastfeeding in public, I would appreciate not swinging in the breeze until I can get you in a position to latch on. Which leads me to my next point.
My body is not a jungle gym! Yes, you’re getting older and exploring, and if there’s something available to climb, better believe you’ll climb it. However, climbing isn’t a problem until you’re trying to climb WITH MY NIPPLE IN YOUR MOUTH! Again, they do not stretch like taffy! Please have some consideration for the fact that they’re actually attached to my body still. Having your elbow digging in my chest and your foot pushing off of my face makes me feel like I’m in an MMA cage fight, but only one of us is doing the damage.
Sometimes I wish I could detach my breasts while you’re nursing! Yes, you read that right. There are so many times when I feel like my bladder is about to explode, but you’re clamped on to my nipple like it’s literally, the jaws of life! I wish I could detach my breasts for a moment and make a beeline to the bathroom. My bladder has sent out code red alarms too many times letting me know it would hold no more. Until then, I didn’t even know I could pull off some of the acrobatic tricks that I have. Some days I make it and you stay sleeping. Other days I have to just let you cry like a blaring alarm just went off and come back to comfort you with an empty bladder. FYI it’s much easier to comfort you when I can sit still and not squirming and doing the peepee dance.
Even with all of those minor nuisances, those are all just itty bitty things compared to the satisfaction I get knowing that the milk and the antibodies you’re receiving from me are quite literally making you healthy and strong. I wouldn’t change this opportunity for anything in the world. Not every mom is afforded this bonding time with their baby and I’m so grateful for it. I just have to keep reminding myself of this when it’s time to nurse you again.